Boring Saturday Night.

I have three posts that have boring in the title... crap.

Maybe I'm just too used to routine that I want to get out of it, but I actually want to get back into routine when I'm out of it. Weird...

Well, I just turned my computer on and waited for something to do but apparently there's nothing? I guess that's what happens when you've been too busy that when you're not busy you think you're bored.

Now I want to talk about my feelings... :))
Weird? Verily. I really don't talk about it because I really like sarcasm. I don't get the connection either but um... yeah. Look, I just feel really curious about what other people think about my feelings. I wanna talk about something in the past that should probably stay in the past but I guess I really haven't conquered it but (hooray, I spelled conquered right :D) it's in the past already. Except I didn't get a chance to reflect and finally end it all. It's always just, random mention here... Okay let's not talk about the other parts. Crap. No more talking about it anymore. I wanted to learn more stuff, but no. Sorry end of questioning.

So if you know me please ask questions or else I'll probably answer with lol and then afterwards I would think, I don't really know who I am, then I get really emo and have low self-esteem. But I get over it because it happens often. IT HAPPENS OFTEN. I'm forced to think about what I should do next or a fantasy sequence in my head but never what I truly am because I don't really know myself. So ask questions so that I can think of an answer and possibly answer my own questions, or question it myself then figure out an answer.

Wow, not a long post since... ever :)) I don't really know why, guess I just found out that even endless scrolling ends. It probably doesn't matter though because I could just easily find another supposedly endless scrolling and start until I get to the end... Maybe I should start a tumblr or maybe read a manga. Meh, whatever. I think I'll look for a game I'm interested to play now, maybe a Sand-box game? Ha! Just kidding... I don't think a sand-box game is good for me right now... because I know they don't have "an ending" like the point at which the game tells you, "Hey, good job! All the levels you grinded just to beat that final final bonus boss are now worthless because you just finished the game and there really is nothing after." Yes... it's true, sand-box games don't have endings... so why bother playing them if there's nothing waiting for you? Sure it's fun while it lasts then it gets repetitive, then well you don't bother playing because there's no ending.

What about games with endings? Well they're fun because "Gosh I want to keep playing so I can find out the next part in the story" ... "but I know I can't until I grind more!" That's when I start to quit. The game just forces you to grind and then boom! I don't finish the game because I know that I have to do that final grinding which is the longest and most tiresome repetitive thing you could possibly do. Yes, Persona 3 I'm talking to you. I haven't finished it because I wouldn't be able to take on the last boss with getting to my highest levels, or so I think. But because I want to finish with all my levels maxed, I have to grind. But quarter way through grinding for the last boss, I decided I didn't want to grind anymore so I stopped. Same with the Patapon games. I stopped because I wanted to grind some more before some boss, but then I got tired with grinding.

I'm so hard to please. Maybe it's why I'm into demanding people? Maybe? I don't know. I haven't been able to make sure because I haven't talked about my feelings.

But yeah, it's all about me. Just me and my adventures through the world. Sure you have your own adventures in your own world, well technically we live in the same world, but whatever.

Maybe life's just a big MMORPG... but instead of picking a starting point and starting there, we're forced into a random starting point where our gold is random, our location is random, the skills available to us are random, we start with completely random stats, and there is no other player in the game that can be the same as us. Or maybe just in the server. Yes, I believe in parallel universes (yes, universes). There must be some other me in some other server (a parallel universe) that started out the same as me but somehow decided to take a different path. Yes I'm talking about maybe becoming a Warrior or a Thief instead of a Black Mage. Or maybe he decided to be named differently ending up with Black Mage L or something. But yeah, I guess we won't know until we travel to the other servers, which maybe the Developer doesn't allow. (If life is a game, yes there is only one "Developer")

So yeah huge ass post ahahaha and if someone still reads this blog then I commend them for waiting for a huge ass post like this and well thanks for reading. If you skipped to the last paragraph I can summarize the whole post.

Games are cool.
I want to play a game.
Reasons why I stop playing a game.
Life might be a game.
Not My Feelings. (So technically I talked about my feelings about certain things, but not some particular thing I'm still to embarrassed to post about and name drop. So yeah!)

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